A Day to be carried

Man I would LOVE this!!! To be carried today like this picture of Sarah carring Rebecca. Today and yesterday have been tough for me. I feel filled with so much wonder and concern about if I am doing everything I need to do...and that I'm not... so there is guilt and then I feel I need to start pulling in the reins on our children because I cannot believe the difference between the age of 10 years and 11 years. To me, in my heart, it has become a point of crisis because I just cannot let this go. I want my children respectful and I want them to voice their views but RESPECTFULLY. I see a change in my 11 year old and it is amazing how it trickles down to all my children. What they think she can do they think they can do also. Things sure need to be nipped in the bud. I think this is alot my fault because I am so careful with my blood pressure cause it really can make me so sick that I have let too many things slide. Also..... my oldest daughter who is only 11 is experiencing a new level in our church family and it has opened her up to a whole new world that I need to know more about so I can decide if this is the path for her. I want to protect her.....I want her to have that promise of the Garden of Eden for as long as possible. I feel I am failing miserably right now and that is even more reason why I need to be healthy....lose weight, get this BP down so I can be active with my children. Right now one quick move and I feel ready to faint...I know that is all BP related and so that is why I am so desperate to lose weight, get healthy..... and be able to have that energy for day to day endurance. I am reading a wonderful book now.....by the Rabbi that is on the "TLC" show "Salom in the home" which means PEACE in the home. It is called "Parenting with Fire". I love this book. I got it Saturday and I am half way through, and for me.....that is GOOD!!! I like so much of what he says and how he explains things. I also am having my weekly Dr. Dobson & Pastor Bob reinforcement through a Sunday School class at church. Plus so many of my friends are having things going on that just tears my heart apart. Put it all together and we must find some joy in the midst of all this. Anyway tonight I am having coffee with a friend. I know we won't solve any world problems or even my problems today...but I need a word from God.... I need a "I'm here and I care and you are doing fine". There is just so much to do in daily life and only so much time in a day and sometimes I just wonder am I doing the things GOD WANTS ME TO DO??? I mentioned last week that I need a daily "to do list" from God to me...so that I WOULD KNOW if I am doing the things that mattered and if I am fighting the good fight or just depleting all my energy for things that don't matter. Todays a day where I feel it piled on high and when one problem is solved...if I walk into another room, answer the phone or check the bank account there will be 1,000 more!!!! God wanted us to walk in peace......... today peace is so far. so far..so far...so far